Its about to be Veterans Day. Please don't forget to take part in the awesome show of respect by purchasing lots of things that are on sale. Its the American way 'ya know. I mean originally in 1938 Congress passed a bill that each November 11 "shall be dedicated to the cause of world peace." So it makes perfect sense to shop and falsly claim patriotism based on how "badass" our military is and how many people we can kill and not keep track of. Kind of like the new Army slogan, "Army Strong", which is replacing "Army of One", the slogan that was put into place after research showed that young people saw life in the military as dehumanizing. So now we have a one BILLION dollar contract to come up with a better slogan. One that lacks a verb and sounds rather like a Neanderthal thumping its chest after it clubbed a woman and drug her off to cook and clean. Only its America thumping its chest, with a club in the form of young recruits not even old enough to be legally trusted with alcohol now being given M-16s and the World being clubbed and drug off to into a forced marriage to American imperialism cooking up dictators and cleaning them up 20 years later. So while our military is busy cleaning up politicians messes from the 80's, eating lousy chow in Iraq and recieving lousy care when they get home rest assured a billion dollars is being used to recruit more soldiers who will ride in unarmored humvees. Smile, its Veterans Day! Remember Army Strong, you not.
So lets not forget this Veterans Day that lots of things are on sale although being a veteran does NOT get me free health care or even an ID card. That's why I am making copies of my DD214 so where ever I go this Veterans Day I can make sure I ask for a discount.
Although I usually don't even get that.

*All detractors rest assure that I did not join the military to "get stuff." I was only told that by years of military indoctrination through advertisement and movies. I joined to serve my country as well. Imagine my surprise when I learned honorable service to my country involved pre-emptive strike against a non-threatening nation that in turn hurt the civilian population the most and led to the torture of many innocent people in mass sweeps of any male old enough to hold a weapon (or too old to hold a weapon). Imagine my surprise to find that torture pictures included "a male Military Police guard “having sex” with a female detainee" according to Major General Antonio Taguba. Yes I am sure she was "having sex" and not being raped.
In the meantime I have found ways to serve my country that invlove morally acceptable ways, like not being in the military for starters.
But I still want the damn discounts. For all the grandstanding of supporting the troops, at least give us a discount if you are gonna ask us to ransack a country.